Are You Who You Want To Be?

Listening to Switchfoot this morning…

  • “Yesterday is a wrinkle on your forehead…don’t close your eyes…today is all you have now. This is your life, are you who you want to be?  This is your life, is it everything you dreamed that it would be?”

What thought provoking lyrics.  Counting the days until I’m forty, I have been asking myself that question more and more lately.  Am I really who I want to be?  I’m a wife to a wonderful man who loves me and cares about me and our children and I am a mother to 3 beautiful, healthy children.  Beyond that, am I all I dreamed I would be?  Honestly, no.  My dream was to be a singer.  I started taking voice lessons when I was 14 and enjoyed singing everywhere.  I sang at church, school, and even a few sports competitions.  I was disappointed with my experience in college…so I stopped pursuing my dream of singing as a career.  I did continue singing at church, but that was it.  I gave up on the dream.  I also dreamed of becoming an artist.  I worked hard to put together my portfolio so I could attend the Atlanta College of Art & Design, and I was even accepted.  But something…myself…held me back and I didn’t ever go.  So, again it was another dream I gave up on.  I even dreamed of being a writer.  Creative writing was the last major I was pursuing before I let life get in the way.  Sadly, I gave up.

Why have I always been so afraid of making my dreams come true?  Why didn’t I have the drive I see in my oldest daughter who wants to pursue a career in acting?

Well, I’ve made a decision.  This is the year I will make my dreams a reality.  I will write them down as goals to achieve.  I will write and not stop until I have written my novel.  I will paint and not stop until I have earned a position to teach others what I love to do.  Mind you, I don’t have as much time as I used to, but I will make the most of the moments I can steal for myself throughout the day.  Everyday I will wake up and write down the dreams I had in the night.  God has put a voice in me that I must share with you, with anyone who will listen.  And when I’m cooking dinner, I will make the time in between stirring and chopping to step into the next room and add paint to my canvas.  I will hone my crafts and love my life.  I will live in the moment of each day.

I am thankful of the blessings God has put in my life…my family especially.  I am also thankful for my new business that allows me the freedom to do the things I love.  And although I don’t have as much time as I would like right now, I know that if I work hard for the next year or two, not only will I have enough time to do the things I love, but I will also have enough money to not worry about paying bills.

Today, I am free in Christ to love my life.  He ministers to me and provides for me in ways no one else can.  Today, I will be who I want to be…

Take a listen to this…


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